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It sounds to me like he wants to have a good relationship – he talks about the future, he introduced you to his family, he treats you like a girlfriend.From what you said, it doesn’t sound like he’s trying to avoid commitment so that he can see other women.I said that my future husband would just take my car and I would take his.He told me that if we marry that that car switching wouldn’t work (he doesn’t like small cars) and that I better buy a car that could hold the entire family (including his family). I can tell you right off the bat that I can’t tell you what the best move is going to be, but I can understand the guy’s reluctance to make it official… For a guy who’s already been married and has custody for one of his two children, I can imagine why he would be very cautious in making commitments with a new woman.All I can say is (from what you’ve told me) is that he sounds like he probably had a rough time with his first marriage and wants to be extra careful this time around.

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I can’t guarantee it in your situation specifically, but generally speaking things can work out as long as the guy is working through his issues.

I processed this and the next day told him that we probably shouldn’t talk or see each other anymore.

My rationale was that I was too emotionally caught up and didn’t know when he would have the ‘capacity.’ He was in utter shock!

He continues to treat me well, but in the back of my mind I’m scared things aren’t going to change and that I’m wasting my time.

I want to have kids and he knows this (and says this is fine) so this further complicates the situation because I don’t want to waste these years with someone who doesn’t have the capacity to commit at this time.

For all I know, he might have committed to his ex-wife and once he did, it was all downhill.

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